Judgment Day

“Do not judge lest ye be judged”. I am pretty sure this is a quote from the Bible (I will have to confirm this with my new Rabbi friend, Jeremy’s mom).

When Sam got the part in The Addams Family, everyone in Arizona was so excited for us: from the teachers to our friends, family and neighbors, to old friends I hadn’t heard from in years. Except for one woman in Arizona who made it her mission to tell everyone what a bad idea it was.

Unfortunately, this woman holds a position of authority in our community and she decided to inform anyone she could that tours were dangerous for children and “she’d never let her kids do one.” She would tell large crowds of people that I was a bad parent for allowing this and that it was “ridiculous” and she was disappointed in me. Most often these crowds would include at least a friend or two of mine, and, as misinformed gossip does, it all got back to me.

I arrived here in New Haven on Friday and observed tech rehearsal all day Saturday. The show is amazing. The sets are incredible, the cast is phenomenal, and the show is hilarious. The music is fantastic and the choreography rocks. The Shubert is a wonderful, historic theatre and I’m enjoying Yale campus. I am committing it all to memory, mostly bc I’m assuming no one in my family will ever go to school here.

The production is run by a wonderful, well-known, professional company who has been producing touring shows for dozens of years throughout the world. The hotel is gorgeous and they are treating us all with such respect. Safety measures abound for all of us from insurance coverage for everything under the sun and strict adherence to laws and educational requirements for working children.

The angry woman I speak of attempted a career in the theatre as a younger girl. She never got any major roles, or made it to Broadway, and this frustrates her. But it ain’t my problem.

She is right about one thing: it is hard. Aidan refuses to speak to me until I come home this weekend; Lauren spent the past weekend crying to Carlotta that this new life is frustrating. I missed a birthday party and the other weekend activities of my kids.

Watching this show unfold is so incredible. I can’t wait to explore new cities and Aidan and Lauren are now able to come to at least two more cities with us in February and March. I am coming home more often than not due to all of our chaperones and I think Carlotta is going to do a week of the tour as chaperone too! I am feeling pulled all over the place and it is both a struggle and a joy, which is what any new situation involves.

So, to you, who I have already confronted in private (and received a full admission stating she is, just, “very concerned”), I say to you, I hope this quells your concerns. And maybe you may want to look inward and figure out who it is you are really disappointed with.


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6 Responses to Judgment Day

  1. DJ says:

    Good for you Ally!! No one can walk in your shoes, but you. There’s no such thing as a perfect parent, but you are perfect for your family and that’s all that matters.

  2. I think this woman should get a job or a hobby. She has way too much time on her hands being “concerned” for your family. It’s six months to do something different and exciting. You didn’t leave your kid with a room fill of rapists. Seriously, Sam has a dream and a passion and your other 2 will survive having to be inconvenienced a little. You would do the same if it were one of them with the chance of a lifetime being offered to them.

  3. Shelley MacDonald says:

    I wish I could say what I really think about this woman’s opinion in this reply, but since I’m gonna be nice, you need to remember that more people than not think what you are doing is wonderful, selfless, and hard! Also, since you didn’t ask for our opinions, unless we have something nice to say, we shouldn’t say anything at all! I think you are brave and know what it is io be a good mommy!

  4. Kelli James says:

    If my parents had not let me do what I was meant to do in this life I can’t imagine what would have happened to me. Bless you for giving this opportunity to your child. They will all know your sacrifice one day… Love you and I will go out with Sam for a week anytime!

  5. Shirley says:

    You are definitely the winner here. In so many ways. Difficult is part of success. Difficult is bringing joy to others. Your sacrifices and Sam’s and the family’s is bringing love and joy and pleasure to thousands, maybe millions. Keep up the good work. And these updates.

    You have my permission to tell this to the “judger.” Or any of your friends. Sounds more like sour grapes to me.

    What a family! You all have reasons to be proud.

    Love, Aunt Shirley

    (Writing in the middle of the night because Limo due at 4 AM for 6 AM flight. Never again. No matter what the cost!)

  6. Linda Pauley says:

    Each parent just needs to focus on what’s best for his or her family…..and not judge, browbeat, or gossip about someone else’s children…..and especially NOT to a large audience. Keep doing what you’re doing Allyson! Your family is lucky to have a mom like you.

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