In The Addams Family Musical, the deceased family ancestors rise from the dead once a year to visit. They are all dressed in white (as they are ghosts), and there are characters ranging from the dead caveman to the dead flight attendant. There are about 10 ancestors in all.
This weekend, we traveled to West Virginia for a one night show. The theatre community there threw the cast a party after the show. After two glasses of wine, when the party-goers asked me what part I played, instead of my usual answer of “Oh, I’m just Pugsley’s mom,” I started to make up a part that I played. I told them that I was one of the ancestors, a woman from the 1950s, wearing a poodle skirt. (This character, by the way, does not exist.) They nodded and said they enjoyed my performance. I told them I was not on stage a lot because my part got cut due to the logistics of the small theatre.
The next day we got up and did a quick, 540 mile, 10 hour, bus ride to Macon, GA, which is where I left Sam today in the hands of Carlotta so that I could come home for Aidan’s birthday. Took a little longer for me to get home when I realized that the plane from Macon to Atlanta had 10 seats and the passengers had to shift to even out their weight during the flight. (This was the plane Carlotta took to get from Atlanta to Macon.) Sooo, I took a shuttle bus to Atlanta in lieu of that helicopter ride and feel much better.
After Lauren was born and we moved to a new house, Craig wanted to get rid of our crib. He insisted we were not having any more kids. We had a showdown in the driveway in front of the moving truck where I insisted we take the crib. Craig grew up with 2 brothers and always had many excuses as to why we should not have a 3rd child. We would need a bigger dining room table, bigger car, and we would all not fit onto rides together at Disneyland. We already had a boy and a girl, and they were both healthy. He booked a vasectomy. I canceled it. I knew there was one family member missing. And when Lauren turned 4 and together we went and signed her up for her last year of preschool, a weepy Craig came to me and said he wanted another one.
I loved that baby from the second I knew he was in there. I enjoyed that pregnancy way more than the other ones. Not only did I have to fight so hard to convince Craig, but I knew it would be my last. Lauren was convinced I was having a girl, so we took her to the ultrasound. She had named the baby “Sparkle Cinderella Jewel Primack” and was so happy about her sister that when the ultrasound tech said it was a boy, she went into a state of total shock. She started screaming and crying and ran out of the room. The tech tried to calm her down and said, “Honey, you are going to have a brother!” 5 year old Lauren looked at her with sheer hate in her eyes and said “I already have a brother, lady.”
When he was born, Aidan came out looking very serious. He was studying the world around him and has remained the most intense child I have met. As my friend Heather says, when Aidan likes you, you feel like you have obtained a serious achievement. My Star Wars loving lego master, who last week opened up his own Instagram account, who thinks he is much older than he is, turns 5 May 1.
5 years ago our lives changed forever. This child has become the center of all of our universes. I could not imagine our family without this boy. And it was all because we took a chance. There were so many reasons why we shouldn’t have another baby. What if he had physical or mental disabilities? We are finally out of diapers, why start again when our kids are 5 and 7? Can we afford it? How much will this wreck havoc on our lives?
And after all the questions, there was only one question that really stood out to me: “Why not?” Why not take a leap of faith and see what happens? And why not has turned out to be the question that has been the key to many of my life’s best decisions. Why not move to Arizona? Why not go on a blind date with this guy named Craig? (Although, I will point out that why not get married outside over Labor Day weekend in Arizona was a bad choice. It was 120 degrees and the rabbi had sweat dripping from his nose that distracted me the whole ceremony.)
We have 2 months left of this tour. I have decided to make these 2 months the most fun I can have. This is my last trip home to AZ and after I go back on tour next week, I won’t be home again until July 1. Why not have the best time? Why not enjoy every second? Why not pretend I was a 50s dancer in the ensemble who was not on stage this show due to “technical issues?” Why not should be the question all of you ask yourselves every day when taking on something new.
Who knows…one of these days I may actually put on that costume and bust onto the stage at the end….. Happy birthday sweet blond haired blued eyed Aidan.