Today I drove to Coronado Island in CA with my kids to visit some friends. During the 5 hour drive, my kids enjoyed the scenery and played “I Spy” while I played my favorite game: beat the GPS’s estimated arrival time. (I won. It said I would arrive at 2:52 and I got there at 2:45. So burn on you, Ms GPS lady voice.)
Ok, I lied. My kids didn’t enjoy the scenery. They didn’t even talk to each other. They never looked up from their electronics the entire drive.
Lauren watched “The Truman Show” and after, I explained to her why it was so genius. The movie was actually made way before reality tv became what it is today. It truly predicted what TV would turn into. I don’t think anyone would be shocked today if a person had a baby for the sole purpose of the world watching it grow up (Im talking to you, Kim Kardashian).
As I almost crashed my car continually checking my phone to see if the royal vagina was fully dilated, I thought about Princess Diana. She would have been a wonderful grandma. The reason she’s not here to meet her new grandson Alastair Spencer Christopher Michael Charles Robert Middleton Windsor the 3rd, is because of the incessant need for reality tv. Those photographers pursued her to get the pictures that we were all so desperate to see (Diana is having dinner? Wow! I gotta see that!)
Diana was the most reluctant of celebrities too. She didn’t seek it out. She wasn’t in our faces waxing her sister’s crotch or yelling at her brother to stop laying around and work on his very important line of designer socks (yep. Kim. You again.)
Today the biggest celebrities are the reality stars. People who make gazillions fighting with family and friends or making out in hot tubs with strangers are raking it in. My mom’s first cousin is one such star. He has written a book, been on talk shows and traveled the world because he films his business for TV (I will not provide his name but let’s just say it’s filmed in Detroit. And people sell things to him and they scream at each other about the value of said items.)
Why do we watch this stuff? How have we turned into this real live Truman Show nation? Didn’t we learn anything from watching our beloved Princess die before our eyes?
I love Reality Bites. Another movie ahead of its time, Ben Stiller turns home movies about Winona Ryder’s friends into trash tv. She is horrified to see what he does for tv ratings. The movie was based on the first reality show “The Real World” but things haven’t changed much since then.
To me, TV is there to escape from reality. Not to watch dance moms screaming at their kids’ teacher and fighting with each other over whose kid got the better part in the show. Trust me, I know these women exist. I don’t need them in my living room.
“Good morning! And in case I don’t see ya, good afternoon, good evening and good night!”